Dim Monkey Attracted To Shiny Things Quits Facebook, Casual Internet Use
After 20 years (give or take a minute or two) of expressing myself online – thoughts, hopes, dreams, jokes, lies, remembrances, imaginings, fantasies, whims, and various pictures of things I found funny, curious, interesting, or was about to eat or drink – I’ve come to one very obvious and somewhat shamefaced conclusion:
WHO CARES?
The internet is a great place for real information but how you’re feeling, what you’re doing this second, and meme spreading aren’t information. They and their ilk are pointless minutiae at best. At worst they create an echo chamber of inanity that obscures more meaning, truth, and reality than it has ever displayed.
Elevating something like your lunch past its proper place of notice does not expand its value, it cheapens it. The less I know about you, the more interesting (or at least inoffensive) you are. The more I know, well …
Nothing has proven the phrase “familiarity breeds contempt” to me more than social networking. After years of rubbing my face all over my own and other people’s merest thoughts, I can honestly say I’ve never had less regard for humanity as a whole, myself included.
The solution? Make like the crawdaddy and back out:
Turn off, Tune Up, Drop By
Pull your head out of your e-ass. Don’t “go online.” Get offline. Quit Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Reddit, and the rest. Forget there even is an “online” when it comes to expression and experience.
TURN OFF – Instead, when the urge to share an image or a thought strikes you, DON’T post it online. Tell a spouse or share it with a family member in real time and real space.
TUNE UP – Better yet, put that stupid phone back in your pocket and GO DO SOMETHING. Practice a skill you’ve dreamed of acquiring. Read a book you’ve been meaning to. Start a project. Don’t do something because you think it will make you look good or interesting to others. Do something because it makes you feel good about yourself and your world.
DROP BY – Discover life the way it used to be. Explore life outside yourself and the endless scroll of digitized ego. Make more use of the fascinating meatspace you fuss, fart, and fuck in. Call a friend, go for a walk, meet a neighbor.
Get a life. A real one.
The irony of my posting this online is not lost on me. Hopefully the truth of what I am saying is not lost on you.
So does this mean you’re going to call me back? ;P
Nah.